The best thing about vibrators is that you can generally use them anywhere (or in most places) and with anyone (those who won’t let you are probably worth doing a ghosting number on). You may choose the colour, shape, stimulation, intensity and so much more. Not to mention the excitement of buying your very first sex toy. These objects were created for your pleasure only. Or were they? This is a sex toy story that will shine a bone-chilling new light on the most pleasurable household objects of all.

Can a vibrator ever give you chills for the wrong reasons? Here is a short story to help us find out.

Do NOT open this drawer: a sex toy story

Chapter I

“It is some time after 12am, in the middle of the night; 1.43am to be exact. I have been struggling to fall asleep for a numbers of days. Even masturbating won’t help. I’ve had to try other avenues, such as asmr videos. They seem to be working; my favourites are those that show people mending vintage accessories or broken make-up products. The object themselves don’t matter, it’s the process and attention to detail I find fascinating. And strangely relaxing.

And it’s working, I’m feeling sleepier by the minute; I remove my earphones and put my phone down on the nightstand. And that is when I start hearing vibrations. It is a muffled noise, one that suggests these vibrations might be coming from another dimension. ‘Who the hell calls people at this time of day?’ I ask myself, both intrigued and annoyed. I take a look at the screen but nothing’s happening there. Whatever this is, it isn’t coming from my phone. And yet I can hear it more and more, and it’s getting increasingly loud. Still, I cannot seem to figure out where it might be coming from. ‘Maybe I’m hallucinating’ and I keep telling myself that until I eventually fall asleep.

Chapter II

However freaked out I was by that mystery noise, I end up forgetting all about it and not giving it another thought. The following day however, upon returning to my room, I feel as though I can hear something still. And in fact, later that night, the mystery noise returns. And just like yesterday, the vibrations just do not seem to stop; after a while, the constant buzzing turn into intermittent vibrations.

It is such a faint noise however that I wonder once more if it is all in my head. Am I going insane? Are phantom vibrations the first sign that I might be losing it? But no, it has to be real. Real enough to keep going on for a third night in a row. I search every corner of my room, every hidden spot. I *must* find out what this is and why it will not stop.

The final chapter

And then, a lightbulb moment: it has been a few days since I last used my vibrator. I open the drawer, the one at the top of my nightstand, and sure enough, there it is: right before my very eyes, and vibrating away as if it doesn’t have a single care in the world. As it if is on mission to drive me insane. The faint buzzing was right there all along, a few centimetres away from my freaked out self. I bring my ear closer just to be sure. And then I wonder: just how has it managed to turn itself on all by itself?

For three whole nights, my vibrator kept buzzing away in my nightstand. What if my mum opened it and accidentally turned it on only to throw it back in there while letting out a squeal? Either that or a pleasure-seeking ghost has been enjoying themselves instead of me. Now let’s charge it so that it is ready to go next time (I am guessing it will take a while), and let’s make a mental note to always double check it is actually off before going back in.”

Now, not everyone believes in ghost stories, but you’d better believe us when we tell you vibrators are silent weapons of mass stimulation! Do you have any goosebump-worthy sex toy story of your own?