We want to declare this the summer of self-love, to place the focus on something we should practice everyday, all the time.
Self-love means accepting and embracing our bodies, it means putting ourselves first, and taking care of our needs, in a number of ways.
Masturbation is one of the key acts of self-love we commit on a regular basis, but more and more of us are also experimenting with self-porn. (Have you tried it yet?)
Are we narcissistic or merely curious? What draws us towards auto-eroticism.
Autoeroticism, also known as autosexuality, falls on a wide spectrum. According to Dr Leon Seltzer, “viewed literally,
autoerotic individuals are attracted primarily—sometimes exclusively—to their own bodies. But appreciated more generally, autoeroticism involves a whole range of sexual behaviours and attitudes.”
Quite far removed from the deep egotism attached to narcissism, autoeroticism doesn’t fall in the category of personality disturbances ; what it does have in common is
a certain physical attraction to oneself. Many of us have been quite fascinated by our reflection in the mirror during sex with a partner, and more often than not, our eyes were on ourselves rather than on them.
That fascination can go quite far: meet the autosexuals. While a majority continues to enjoy and seek partner sex despite our masturbation routine,
“for ‘classic’ autosexuals—that is, those at the farthest reaches of the autoerotic continuum—the only supplemental stimulus they might require would be either a sexually provocative photo of themselves, or the mirror nearest them.”
There are a number of reasons behind the appeal of autoeroticism: pleasure is one of them.
When confronted to somewhat unsatisfying partner sex (remember the pleasure gap?),
the prospect of relying on ourselves as the sole providers of our orgasms becomes highly seductive. However we might still conjure up images of others, or images of ourselves engaged in sexual activities with others, as a masturbation support; the higher we rate on the autosexual scale, the less others will feature in those fantasies.
And then there’s the deep curiosity attached to the way we look while doing it…
How do you do it? A few essential self-porn tips.
You don’t need much:
a front-facing camera might just do it. But if you want to put more thought into it, you might as well grab your go-to camera and a tripod. What truly counts is that you create an environment in which you feel totally comfortable; if a more professional setup makes you feel somewhat self-conscious, skip it for now and reconsider it later.
When do you feel most desirable?
Get yourself ready for yourself with the same attention (or lack thereof) you would for a partner. This might mean just taking your clothes off, or wearing a specific type of lingerie in which you truly feel comfortable and confident (which might not involve the suspenders you’d wear to make someone else happy).
While you’re doing this for yourself, you could potentially create a mood with
softer lighting, or even a coloured light bulb if you want to make more a visual statement.
You probably have a go-to me-time
favourite playlist already; if you decide to play it, try to
keep the volume at the right level so you can hear yourself breathe, moan and potentially scream as you climax. We’re big on audio stimulation and listening to the sounds you make will no doubt act as a potent turn-on.
Should you share? Not necessarily. Not every masterpiece needs an audience. If you do so, we bet you already know how to do so responsibly; we practically invented a new form of dialogue through sexting. But whatever you decide,
remember you are your initial target and don’t let the though of an outside gaze influence you in any way; don’t overthink or curate camera angles or lighting for the sole purpose of being more attractive to someone else. This, more than almost anything else in your life, truly is about loving yourself.
🏖 Celebrate the summer of self-love with us! 🎁 For a limited time, you’ll receive an exclusive illustrated tote when you order one of our toys. 
